I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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