I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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