Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize