I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
