what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
