Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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