I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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