Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I am spending my child support on dildos
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
