What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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