If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Randomize