Only a mothe r could love this liver
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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