Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
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