I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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