is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
