Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
