so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
