Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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