Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
