google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
