I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
