The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
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