he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
