When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
i think i just lost a toe
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