I think i peed on brittanys purse
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
wow bdsm is so cute
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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