I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I just googled if crying burns calories
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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