New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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