we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
