I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
