Your tits are I can't wait for
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize