She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
