remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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