Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
