yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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