"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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