i think my tv is drunk
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize