yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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