Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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