Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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