dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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