don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
