3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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