You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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