I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
