And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
