i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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