But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
