69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
