this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
