doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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