yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
